Hola,
Well I just got back from Mexico. It was the most Spiritual trip I had, yet we had the least "spiritual" events that we have ever had. I have learned how to sort of go off alone and find God.
Like Elijiah (this is spelled wrong probably). Anyway, he (Elijiah), wanted to hear from God. So he climbed a mountain top, and waited soon a great earthquake came and shook violently and great boulders fell and tremendous things happened, but he did not hear God in the earthquake. Then a great sign of fire roared about and he did not find God in the fire. But when he waited and passed through all of the great 'signs'; he heard Gods voice in the sweet quiet wind, and the shuffling of leaves.
You see I have seen many great Holy Spirit moves, in which; many people a very fanatically moved. And they show it. I am all for them. BUT the only time I feel that I CAN get to know Gods heart is when it is just He and I. No great show or move of many people jumping up and down and what have you. I hear God when I sit down, shut up, and say, "God this is Your time, come speak to me." Three times when I did that on this trip God sent a PERSONAL REVIVAL to my heart, and I am changed. He had also send people to share their heart when all I was doing was praying alone, then we prayed together and relationships began.
All and all God is moving in my life. In Mexico there was this widow with a very severely retarded daughter. Before I knew that she was a widow, alone, or without a family, God impressed it upon my heart to love on her. So I hugged her. I expected it to be a 1 second hug but God said don't let go. And we hugged for 5 or 10 minutes while I and the group prayed for her. My shirt was full of her tears, and my tears were all over hers. Then we went to her daughters' room and she was so adorable. Even though her hands folder back and she had her own waste on her, when Jesus called us to love he called us to look over all of that and I did and held her hand and she just smiled and was so happy. It broke my heart in two. I have seen many things, because I've been on 11 trips, but nothing is more pure, precious, and/or joyful than to see a handicapped child of poverty look directly into my eyes and smiling. From that day on I decided that I would continue with ministering to the needy children, widows, and the poor people of this world. I say 'of this world' because they all are contempt, married, and rich in God.
I also learned that the more I serve God and His people the more He blesses me with joy, love, and freedom.
When I walked alone to visit with God, he revealed my heart, un-forgiveness, and my struggles, I repented and he quickly showed me how proud He was of certain things. He treated me just as a real father would. I can not exactly explain how, but He did. For once I felt the full love of my Father. Although my true father never could love me, He has. He has also adopted me into His kingdom. Just Him and I. What a concept, what a love, what a God.
God Bless,
Terrill W. Strader
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Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God
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